Janine's Story

For as long as I can remember I had always thought I would like to be a mum. I just didn't think it would happen as soon as it did. I fell pregnant in August 1995. it came as a surprise to me when I saw the pregnancy test was positive. The doctor must have seen the look of surprise on my face, she asked if it was an unplanned pregnancy to which my reply was yes. I went on to tell her that I didn't know how I was going to tell my family.

The doctor told me to take the rest of the afternoon off work and come back to see her the next day. That night I realised I hadn't asked the doctor any questions or for any information regarding pregnancy information organisations. The next day, she made me an appointment with MAREEBA and gave me a referral letter. She then told me that they would give me some support and guidance about my pregnancy. I had never heard of MAREEBA so I assumed that it was a clinic which provided information for expecting parents.

When I arrived at MAREEBA I was quite confused by the security locks and by the red-eyed girls emerging through the front door. It wasn't until I began talking to a counsellor about my pregnancy that I realised that I was in an abortion clinic. I began speaking to the counsellor about choosing a hospital to have my child at, when she posed the question "is having a child what you really want, because I sense some uncertainty". I then revealed my insecurities and reservations about having a child at my age (I was 21 at the time).

She then explained that abortion was an option and she went on to say that it could be arranged within the next week. For a split second I actually contemplated terminating my pregnancy. When I came to my senses I told her that this appointment was a mistake, to which she replied 'Many girls feel this way at first'. I got out of my chair and left the clinic.

I never ventured down the path of having an abortion but what I can tell you about is having a child. Amy was born on the 16th May 1996. 1 endured 24 hours of labour, but when I think about my childbirth experience I don't think of the pain, I think of the giving support I received from my partner and my mother-in-law. That very special first moment I laid eyes on my baby girl. When I look at her now at 6 months old I see someone who loves me unconditionally and a miracle that my partner and myself brought into the world.

I can't say that it's easy being a mum, because at times it can be very hard. Stress and 'morning' sickness resulted in having to withdraw from a couple of subjects delaying the completion of my degree by one year. But what is one year compared to Amy's lifetime. It is all worthwhile when I see her smile and develop. I believe having Amy was a much better option than facing the guilt and uncertainty many women face post abortion.